About Self-Doubt and Self-Belief

Everyone Wants to Be an Influencer

image: Pixabay

Serendipity? I read an article on Medium where the author said how everyone wanted to be an entrepreneur working on a killer app from their parent’s basement or an influencer.

Is that a bad thing? At least they have goals, they are driven, no? They believe in their dreams, no?

Likewise, there are dozens of articles on my LinkedIn feed showing how everyone is quitting their jobs and following their dreams.

Meanwhile, I spend my 9-5 daily working in-person in a windowless office, I procrastinate like crazy, and my word count is 500 words a day if I am lucky. Five hundred words are not much progress when you are trying to write a speculative fiction novel, especially one that may end up becoming a “trunk novel” (fingers crossed).

In an age when everyone wants to be an influencer and everybody and their sister is self-publishing, why pursue traditional publishing?

image: Pixabay

As a matter of fact, why insist on becoming a writer? Why keep on blogging? Why?

There are so many days when self-doubt attacks me and defeatism infects me.

Am I making progress? Is it worth it? Does anyone care? Why do I put myself through this?

Negative self-talk becomes doubt, and doubt grows into self-doubt.

No one is immune to doubt. No one. Self-doubt is the worst. It is a little voice, like those small devils in kid’s cartoons, telling us “no, you can’t.”

What to do?

Self-Awareness to the Rescue

image: DepositPhotos

Self-awareness is so underrated. Every self-help guru swears by it. And unlike a lot of their BS advice, this is one are I wholeheartedly agree. You need to know yourself, your strengths, and your weaknesses.

Self-aware people are more successful because they take time to reflect on what works and doesn’t, what they can improve, what they need to improve, et cetera.

Furthermore, they seek criticism, even welcome it.

You cannot improve if you don’t know what and where to improve. Moreover, when you are honest with yourself, you don’t waste time pursuing things that do not align with your goals and personality.

For example, I knew medical school was not for me because I cannot stand the sight of blood and could not take losing a patient. I knew accounting was not for me if math was not my favorite subject in school.

When we are honest with ourselves we do not have to follow what is trendy to be successful. Instead, we do what we enjoy and what we are good at and become successful at it.

Nonetheless, self-doubt will creep in. Constantly. Like a goblin, eating your confidence. Self-doubt is an imp trying to destroy the giant inside you. Do not feed it.

And yet, if you doubt yourself, it does not mean you have no confidence. It means you are a critical thinker.

Questioning your goals and intentions is not a bad thing. In effect, it prevents self-delusion.

Remember Your Why

image: DepositPhotos

Thus, we should, to quote Simon Sinek, ask ourselves, what is our why? Why do we want to do what we do?

And we need to be honest too. If it is fame and money, we cannot pretend otherwise.

My why should be different than your why. And vice versa. All reasons are valid because they are personal.

Some people want to change the world; others only want to change their neighborhood. Some want to make a buck; others want to make thousands.

In the end, we need to be prepared to have our sacrifices, time, and efforts match our ambitions. The bigger our ambitions the more we need to ask of ourselves.

For instance, if you want to win your local club match, you don’t need to train daily. If you want to be an Olympian, waking up at 5 AM and training for hours on a strict diet is a must.

Your why will keep you going despite the goblins, demons, and imps whispering in your ear, eating away at your motivation. It matters to know your why.

For instance, I want to write because I am tired of boring sci-fi and I want to see more blue-collar sci-fi.

Everyone needs a why. If you don’t have a why you will end up giving up because there is no underlining reason to motivate you.

Shoemaker to your Shoes!

image: Tumblr

If there is a Spanish phrase I like is “zapatero a sus zapatos” (Shoemaker attend to your shoes). It means we should mind our business and only give opinions about those things we have expertise in.

In brief, self-awareness.

Rather than worry about what everyone else is doing (whether is becoming an entrepreneur or influencer), let them be. We only live once. Just don’t add to their self-doubt.

Moreover, don’t let self-doubt stop you.

Believe in yourself. There is a giant inside of you.

image: Pixabay

Self-awareness will kill self-doubt. Nevertheless, you won’t know your limits until you try.

Therefore, before you give up, keep trying. And remember, even the best shoemaker needs a blueprint and a cast before he starts working on a shoe. All the self-belief in the world cannot replace a bad blueprint.

In conclusion, self-belief is good but make sure to lay the foundation first.

Reader, do you struggle with self-doubt too?

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June 2023
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